Hungry For Your Love Chapter 3

First off, let me take a minute to thank everyone who’s added me or my story to their alerts or favorite lists – you guys make my freaking day! Second, thanks for everyone giving this a chance – I know it’s not a normal ES story, but hope you’ll love it just the same!

Oh, and I promise to get back to Between the Sheets and Revelry – but this little is a muse whore and won’t let me go just yet…

Thanks to MissyDee and BaltiK for being allstar betas!

Disclaimer – I don’t own any of these characters, Charlene Harris does… and she’s a lucky, lucky gal.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

EPOV

I’m fucking my wife and it’s taking every ounce of my self control not to call her Sookie. I quite literally have to bite my tongue, my cheek, her shoulder – anything I can – in order to keep from ending my marriage tonight. She would not see the fucking humor in it happening again, and I’m damn near positive she’d never let me leave the house again.

Oh yeah, it happened before. See, I got shitfaced drunk one night when Sam and Tommy came to visit a ways back. We sat around all night, listening to the music of our youth and relieving the ‘old days’ – well, the old days were filled with Sook. So naturally, even though her name wasn’t said often – seeing as Felicia has no sense of humor about that particular subject – I thought of her enough that by the time I climbed into bed with my wife, I was in full on fantasy mode.

Some advice? Never, ever, say I love you to your wife but call her by your ex’s name.

Somehow, women just can’t find the funny in that…

It took her nearly two weeks to speak to me for anything other than a necessity, and close to four months before things were somewhat normal again. Not that I blame her for being pissed at me; I’d fucking shit if she called me some other dude’s name.

So, needless to say I’m ready to bite my fucking tongue off right now. I’m so ashamed to admit it, but I don’t even see Felicia’s face right now. I’m fucking her for all I’m worth –it’s the best sex we’ve had in years, and it’s all because my mind is fucking flooded with images of my Sweetcheeks. Her lips, her smile, those tits, her tiny hands wrapped around my cock; my mind races through all the ways we made love.

I’m so fucking close to losing my mind right now, I’m honestly afraid I’m going to break the skin on her shoulder; I know I’m going to end up leaving a hickey. Felicia’s making all sorts of noises as I pound into her – more than she’s made in years. The sounds are irritating and make me want to muzzle her. I know that probably sounds awful, but really – how many times do you want to hear someone squeak like a mouse while you’re fucking the shit outta them? There’s nothing sexy or even romantic about the noises she’s making; it’s like someone’s stomping on a dog’s chew toy.

FUCK, I miss sex with Sookie! Even when she used to scream her brains out, the sounds were sexy. The noises my wife makes cause my dick to deflate – the noises Sook made when we were together made me lose control. As much as I want to live in this fantasy forever, I simply can’t stand her fucking noises anymore. If I can’t fuck my wife in any position except missionary, then I certainly don’t want to have to hear her bleat like a dying cat while I’m stuck in this position.

I quickly conjure up my best fantasy of my girl. She’s down on her knees before me licking my rock hard cock from base to tip, pausing to suckle the head as she caresses my balls. After a few agonizing moments, she finally takes me into her mouth, deep throating me on the first pass. My eyes roll back in real life as I feel the tightening within my abdomen – I won’t last much longer, thinking of my angel swallowing my cock whole. Sookie is staring into my eyes as she devours me whole, playing with her perfect cunt as she drives me closer to release. Just as I’m right on edge in my fantasy, I flip her over and grab her hips – slamming into her fully in one hard thrust. I can feel my balls start to tighten and as the white lights start to flash behind my eyes, my fantasy Sookie looks over her shoulder at me and tells me “I love you, baby, always.”

I fucking lose it, coming harder than I have in years. I go deaf and blind as I seize through my climax. Fuck, I haven’t come this hard since the night I called my wife Sookie. I’m still twitching as I pull out of Felicia, kissing her on the forehead.

“Eric, that was incredible,” she sighs.

Yes, it was. Incredibly wrong. Incredibly fake. Incredibly fucking heartbreaking!

“It was lovely, dear.” I don’t know what else to say.

She gets up to clean herself up as I settle into my side of the bed. I set my alarm for bright and early; there’s so much to do tomorrow.

Tomorrow. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

I’m going to see my Sweetcheeks…tomorrow.

My wife comes back from the bathroom and snuggles in behind me. I always loved holding Sookie – not that we ever really got to sleep that way often since we were just kids, but I really don’t care for cuddle time with anyone else – not even my wife. I try to ignore the feeling of sheer terror in my stomach as she rubs against my back and asks if we can consider another child.

Fuck no we can’t!

When I ask her why she would even think that, she tells me that if sex is going to be like this, then maybe we’re going to be okay enough for another baby. I remind her that she’s had her tubes tied and that another child would not be good for her health after what she went though with the boys. The emergency c-section she had to have left the very real possibility that any further children could end her life or that of the baby’s.

Felicia spends the next half hour trying to convince me that another child is just what our marriage needs. I’ve tried to be gentle; I’ve tried to be diplomatic and not say “FUCK NO” at the top of my lungs. Another baby is not fucking happening with her.

“Fifi, look…I don’t want to fight and I don’t want to hurt you. But I do NOT under any circumstances want another baby at this point in my life. I’m done having babies.” I hope she takes me seriously because I’m not kidding. I make a mental note to wear condoms from now on – I don’t trust she won’t try to trap me.

She harrumphs, and flops onto her other side – far away from me. I’m actually quite okay with this. I tell her that I’m going to head into the city tomorrow for supplies for the bar and a meeting with a few potential clients; that way she won’t get nervous if I’m gone for a while tomorrow. She barely acknowledges me as she shuts off her bedside lamp.

I just lie here for a while, staring at nothing, running through the possibilities of tomorrow. I’ve got butterflies the size of small aircraft buzzing in my gut; I can’t remember the last time I was this nervous. It seems to take forever, but I finally drift off to sleep. My dreams are filled with the sights, sounds and tastes of my little bottle of sunshine. Holy fucking hell, I’ve missed her so fucking much. I’ve never told anyone how much I miss her, not even my best friends. I could never fool my subconscious though – my dreams often have her in a leading roll. Most often she takes the place of my wife; tonight is no different as I picture Sookie’s rounded belly as she carries my child.

ooOOOOoo

When my alarm goes off in the morning, I’m floored by the song playing. It’s an oldie by the Crüe, “Without You.” Fuck. Me. I used to listen to this song endlessly when I first moved out here. I’d play that tape, over and over, crying in my apartment alone. Girlie? Yeah, I know, but I was fucking broken when I left her.

I lie here listening to the words wondering if this is an omen for today – it has to be, right? I haven’t heard this song in fucking years, it’s gotta mean something. My eyes prick, but I don’t let the tears start, as I hear my favorite lines: “You’re the reason the sun shines down and the nights, they don’t grow cold. Only you that I’ll hold when I’m young, only you…as we grow old.”

That was always how I thought of me and Sookie – together, forever. She was my youth, and I never dreamed back then that she wouldn’t be my future. I held her so tightly when we were young, and to this day – she’s the one I wish I could hold until I’m old. I take just another minute to reminisce on what was, before getting up and finding out what is.

My life is going to change today – I can feel it in my bones. Now, I’m not thinking that suddenly Sookie and I are going to fall into each other’s arms and the last twenty years will just disappear – I’m smarter than that. What I mean is that my life has been stagnant for a while now; I’ve just been existing in it.

I don’t want to exist, I want to live. I love my sons, more than I’ve ever loved anything – even Sookie. I love owning my bar, and the sense of accomplishment and pride that comes with it. The problem is those are the only two things I love about my life. Unfortunately, they are not the two most compatible things on earth as having children and working horribly late nights isn’t always easy. I’ll never abandon my children – but goddamn it – I want to live for me too.

I hop out of bed and get in the shower cleaning myself quickly, but thoroughly, and rouse the boys. Once I’m sure they’re getting ready and not just climbing back into bed, I go downstairs and get breakfast going. French toast, bacon, and eggs – plus juice for all and coffee for the adults. I enjoy making breakfast for my boys. I don’t enjoy that Felicia is supposed to be the ‘homemaker’ and yet won’t make breakfast for her family…but that’s an old argument and one I’m not in the mood to revisit it this morning.

Breakfast is served and devoured by all and now it’s time to get the boys to school. After a reminder to Felicia that she has to pick up the boys today and a quick kiss to the cheek, we’re off. So help me god, if she forgets them again – I’ll skin her alive.

The boys comment on how much happier I seem this morning and ask “what’s the deal, pops” in unison. That twin thing is fucking creepy sometimes, just so you know – cool, yet strangely creepy.

While my boys are quite smart for ten year olds, it breaks my heart to find out they notice how unhappy I am in my life. Children shouldn’t have to know things like this, especially not this young. “Well boys, I’m just having a great start to the day.” Hey, my kids do not need to know that my fantasy girl and love of my life called last night so I got laid semi-proper for the first time in fucking ages.

“I’ll bet he got some from mom,” Liam announces with certainty.

“Are you kidding me right now? Where would you even hear something like that?” I’m wondering what TV show I’m going to have to block, or friends I’ll have to ban, as I wait for his answer.

I’m doing my best not to bust up laughing when Alex announces, “well, it’s either that – or someone was killing a cat last night. I mean, did you hear that shit?” Oh holy fuck. Welcome to my world – it sucks being an adult here as it’s not okay to laugh at inappropriate, yet uproariously funny shit!

I cough to stifle the laugh as I reprimand my two wingnuts. “Okay, enough you two. First of all,” I put on my ‘dad’ voice, “we do not talk about this kind of stuff at your age. Second, we don’t swear.” I pause to give them the stink eye in the rearview. “And where are you guys hearing such things lately?”

They roll their eyes, in unison again, and say “Duh, Dad, everywhere!” Like I’m the stupidest father on earth.

Bet if I lock them in their rooms for the next decade they won’t hear this shit anymore…

We arrive at school and I give them hell for their language and conversational content again before letting them out of the SUV. After I’m sure they’re out of sight, I burst out laughing at the shit that came out of my sons’ mouths. I’m cackling like a lunatic as I head out towards the highway. I stop to fill up before hitting Hwy 50 and send Sook a text letter her know I’m in route.

In less than an hour I’ll be seeing my Sookie again. My heart starts to race at the prospect, and leaps into triple time when she texts back to tell me her room number and that she’s “bouncing in place with excitement.”

She better not do that shit when I get there! I’m really glad she’s excited that she’s going to see me and all, but just the thought of her glorious tits bouncing like that has my dick snapping to attention. If I actually have to see that, I’m in serious danger of breaking my vows.

What the fuck have I gotten myself into here?

“Without You” by Mötley Crüe

Without You, There’s No Change
My Nights And Days Are Grey
If I Reached Out And Touched The Rain
It Just Wouldn’t Feel The Same

Without You, I’d Be Lost
I’d Slip Down From The Top
I’d Slide Down So Low
Girl You’d Never, Never Know…

Without You, Without You
A Sailor Lost At Sea
Without You, Woman
The World Comes Down On Me

Without You In My Life
I’d Slowly Wilt And Die
But With You By My Side
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But With You In My Life
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But Without You, Without You…

Without You, My Hope Is Small
Let Me Be Me All Along
You Let The Fires Rage Inside
Knowing Someday I’d Grow Strong

Without You, Without You
A Sailor Lost At Sea
Without You, Woman
The World Comes Down On Me

Without You In My Life
I’d Slowly Wilt And Die
But With You By My Side
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But With You In My Life
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But Without You, Without You…

I Could Face A Mountain
But I Could Never Climb Alone
I Could Start Another Day
But How Many, Just don’t Know
You’re The Reason The Sun Shines Down
And The Nights, They Don’t Grow Cold
Only You That I’ll Hold When I’m Young
Only You…As We Grow Old

Without You In My Life
I’d Slowly Wilt And Die
But With You By My Side
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But With You In My Life
You’re The Reason I’m Alive
But Without You, Without You..

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Well, their big meeting is coming up next, but I thought it was important to get into Eric’s head for a little bit and see how things went with his poodle – I mean wife, lol. Fifi – kills me…

Love and hugs to all – thanks for taking this journey with me!

back button

home button

next button

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s